by Chris de Serres
I wake up early. I am not always successful, but I want to give myself the opportunity to start the day the right way. I may meditate or stretch or write. Often I like to go outside and let the cold morning air wake me up. I give myself an hour to decide.
Then she saunters out of bed with her book. We snuggle for a minute, then she reads. When I leave for work, she reads. When I come home from my day she is where I left her. Reading.
I often wonder if this child is mine. My life is ruled by distraction. Stuck in this loop of multitasking. Always delving into my IPhone or Facebook. When I am stressed I go even deeper into distraction. It is my primary way of dealing with the world. Even sex serves simply to alleviate the pressure around me.
It is how the world created us. We are people perpetually waiting at a bus stop. Waiting for time to run out. So we can stop and finally rest.
This child has something so precious to us adults. The ability to focus. To do something from beginning to end. One thing. She just does.
Me? I prepare everything the night prior on the off-chance that I will wake up and be able to do one thing. The morning feels like my only chance to begin this day in calm and peace. I have forgotten how to just do.
Every morning, she reads and I obsessively try to figure out how to be more like her.